Pep Talks

Fundamentals of Realating

A 12-Week Deep Dive in Rewiring the Way We Connect

April 1st — June 20th, 2025

Develop social ease, emotional intelligence, and the ability to navigate interactions in with depth and confidence.

Welcome.

Welcome exactly as you are.

I’m honored that you chose to be a part of this.

Below is an overview of each session we’ll have together, and how to access them.

Recordings and other resource materials will be added to this page as well.

So it’s a good idea to add this to your bookmarks.

See you on the inside!

Session Schedule

Week 1 — Welcoming

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

April 1st, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1cV_VYbSNUImtPhn0U0QZCJ_tQNRN6bW3

Listicles:

5 core practices of Authentic Relating (as defined by ART International):

Welcome everything
Assume nothing
Reveal your experience
Own your experience
Honor self and other

6 levels of conversational depth:

External information
Personal information
Personal stories
Philosophizing
Emotional
Relational

Week 1 practices:

1. As you go through your week, exploriment with “welcoming everything” and observe.

2. Practicing noticing which level of conversational depth you are in, and play with moving between them.

Integration Call:

Date and time:

April 4th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o89M9utvQnPGdudhCFrT8wgvCG1VRVO7/

Week 2 — Staying In Reality

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

April 8th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/16pBDeHflD5hRioUTOmAj89YV2UxMQp-g/

Listicles:

The Work (by Byron Katie):

1. Is it true?

2. Can I absolutely know it’s true?

3. How do I feel (and react) when I believe it?

4. Who would I be without this thought?

The window of resilience (will be looked at in depth later on):

Week 2 practices:

As you go through your week:

1. Notice your assumptions

2. Notice the ways you’ve damned others , yourself or the world.

3. Notice how that impacts you and your relationships.

Integration Call:

Date and time:

April 11th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/a-_jMgIvALJs_e9UQUUj0qyrOS4Aah7SCPMjTUnMkDGvg2clFd6mxrW07Ubi24SD.WD5Y6tXVAdIT1G8I?startTime=1744385595000
Passcode: q^26+635

Week 3 — Revealing

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

April 15th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/ReW0mbN3C-usx8i4M2mmHhLZwNMtD9eT_rQKdR6TJBbJ6LPmWOwflDDNHjAhK_c.Aoe36S0BbgDQ6O1G
Passcode: c?P?5tXC

Listicles:

5 principles of presence (as defined by Margo Greenwood):

1. Embodiment

2. Unknowing

3. Vulnerability

4. ???

5. ???

Week 3 practices:

1. Practice revealing your experience and notice what happens.

Integration Call:

Date and time:

April 18th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/S91mfsi2Of-9F3GBsc48M_LRPOr1gtuoWMJT1aIFHrvBB496saXx3kzZQfHJW3cn.4ECpeEsdO6V4cZcd
Passcode: hRFmj8&0

Week 4 — Curiosity and Empathy

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

April 22nd, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/vZLXIw1zfYkL-RPoe6ONwMFGceXqGeSFVpjurPihDLPPfX4NfXxBqJmO_8g5nlvb.u5CofkJOd6D2GHkz
Passcode: wOq.v5*?

Listicles:

3 levels of listening (as defined by ART International):

1. WHAT is being communicated?

2. HOW is it being communicated?

3. WHY is it communicated?

5 levels of empathy (as defined by me, currently):

1. Cognitive empathy

2. Contextual empathy

3. Personal empathy

4. Affective empathy

5. Grokking

5 practices of Circling (as defined by “Relatefulness” and “Transformational Connection” in Europe):

1. Commitment to connection

2. Own your experience

3. Stay with the level of sensation

4. ???

5. Be with the other in their world

Week 4 practices:

As you go through your week:

1. Play with “listen + reflect + impact” while you listen to people.

2. Notice the ways you’ve damned others or create assumptions, and apply curiosity to “cure” it (this includes damning others for their damning or assuming they’re assuming)

3. Feeling bold? Invite someone to play the curiosity game!

Important:

There is no integration call on Friday for this week.

Week 5 — Ownership and Responsibility

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

April 28th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/DBOygw4slajiOE-KHtc0z_xGnTupTjV5Mls85xWJfMsqfo9XnAFPJMXHNWqKduUJ.Un_j16W026VpDbMl
Passcode: @^Z96rfn

Week 5 practices:

As you go through your week:

1. Try and practice owning your experience, particularly using “I statements”, in moments when you feel it isn’t emotionally challenging.

2. In situations when you know it would be good to own your experience but it feels unavailable or scary to do so: Write down why. (We can use this in next week’s session.)

3. Practice sharing “truths” with people in this WhatsApp group:

“_(person’s name/entire), when you __ (identify a particular, unarguable moment or experience), I felt __(share an emotion)”

You can also share them addressed to the entire group.

Integration Call:

Date and time:

May 2nd, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/zBGnDTMNca7r_vyLRAQzKvdSnSJWowiPh7hP_CpyeL06Nv54qmVLjUjDDXh_epFD.jWgPDG-GZFMQj9-X
Passcode: Fw+V7aTk

Week 6 — Needs, Wants and Strategies

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

May 6th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/LicGmiPEZFSZv9F3lZ263D3dFe8_oqyI3M-F1sM3YuivI6_1YpPqPGlSWcfGjiZi.y5IcyMSyHOpinE-P
Passcode: Ru4Fd$Hp

Listicles:

8 Core fears (as defined by ART International):

1. Fear of abandonment

2. Fear of being controlled

3. Fear of being ignored / invisible

4. Fear of rejection

5. Fear of criticism

6. Fear of inadequacy / failure

7. Fear of being trapped

8. Fear of being misunderstood

4 childhood attachment needs (as defined by Susan Campbell):

1. Protection

2. Loving attention

3. Guidance and encouragement –

4. Co-regulation

5 universal human needs (as defined by Marshall Rosenberg):

1. Connection

2. Physical well-being

3. Autonomy

4. Meaning

5. Play

Pseudofeelings:

Week 6 practices:

As you go through your week:

Observe your feelings, pseudofeelings, judgments and maybe even personality traits. Which need could be underneath them?

Integration Call:

Date and time:

May 9th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Zoom link (different each time):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/82057738393

Meeting ID: 820 5773 8393

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

Week 7 — Honoring Self and Other

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

May 13th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/xagMS9Pkc4s7yP4HE_w_LIgZJhNb7unqaYIjzNCyNQEkzbCx5vUlo2I5qD9u6QX_.PHU1mAcd2nkTVqUt
Passcode: poJxs&p2Passcode: Ru4Fd$Hp

Week 7 practices:

As you go through your week:

Explore and apply dignity/humility to your life and notice what comes up
Observe your holograms and see what happens if you try to do the opposite

Integration Call:

Date and time:

May 16th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Zoom link (different each time):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/84845929654

Meeting ID: 848 4592 9654

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

Week 8 — Giving and Receiving

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

May 20th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1T73hA4fmS4vU5M7LXXsYY3HbE6l4cpsQ/view?usp=drive_link

Week 8 Practices:

1) Say no to something you’d normally say yes to

2) Ask for something you normally wouldn’t ask for

3) Find a real conflict to bring next week

4) Optional: Invite someone to the 3 minute game:

“How would you like me to touch you for 3 minutes?”

“How would you like to touch me for 3 minutes?”

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

May 27th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1gDG_RXwKIT5iy1oky4jrJ2unTDWn9gar?usp=drive_link

Listicles:

5 types of “conflict” (as currently defined by me):

Misunderstanding
Unacknowledged Impact
Unmet Needs
Conflicting Strategies
Conflicting Needs (extremely rare)

Week 9 practices:

1. Lean into discomfort in conversations.

2. ⁠Practice finding the pause between stimulus & response.

3. ⁠If someone brings a conflict to you, try practicing “emotional aikido”. If you feel conflict, try practicing “emotional alchemy”.

Integration Call:

(there will be no integration call this week, it is postponed to a later date)

Week 10 — Subtext, Vibe and Energetics

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

June 3rd, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1N4toZEJQQ5TRUasYn6DhMDMJaoH1sN8K/view?usp=drive_link

Listicles:

Different dimensions in communication:

5 practices of circling (as defined by “Transformational Connection” and “Relateful”):

1. Commitment to connection

2. Owning your experience

3. Staying with the level of sensation

4. Trusting your experience

5. Being with the other in their world

Week 10 practices:

1. Listen for subtext in communication: What’s not being said?

2. In conversations, hold in mind the question: “What’s it like to be me/you right now?”

3. When you say something, try following with “…and what I mean by that is___” to discover your own subtext.

Integration Call:

Date and time:

June 6th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1m4anBlG7hDrNRDLIBL2CwGEnkdL163wO/view?usp=drive_link

Week 11 — Wholeness

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

June 10th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1sftwVYaKwGS346q50BriMOIY0qzXoIus?usp=drive_link

Listicles:

5 principles of presence (as defined by Margo Greenwood):

1. Embodiment

2. Vulnerability

3. Unknowing

4. Wholeness

5. ???

Integration Call:

Date and time:

June 13th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Recording:

(This week’s integration called turned out to be a 1:1 session, so it wasn’t recorded to maintain privacy.)

Week 12 — Awesomeness

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

June 17th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Zoom link (recurring for Tuesday workshops):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/89286816358

Meeting ID: 892 8681 6358

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

Integration Call:

Date and time:

June 20th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Zoom link (different each time):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/87911786061

Meeting ID: 879 1178 6061

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

Post-cohort Integration Calls

After week 12, there will be 2 more integration calls as part of the cohort.

The date for these is yet to be decided together, to ensure everyone can be a part of them.

From there on, you will have the possibility to join monthly workshops which continue to build on the practices we learned during the cohort.

1:1 Support

If you need additional 1:1 support around the topics from any of the session, you can freely schedule a call with me, using this link (availability will be added to the scheduler once cohort start).

Additional Questions?

If you have any remaining questions about this course, you can always reach out to me via email:

pep (at) peptalksblog.com

Pep Talks

Fundamentals of Realating

A 12-Week Deep Dive in Rewiring the Way We Connect

Welcome.

Session Schedule

Week 1 — Welcoming

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

Recording:

Listicles:

Further Reading:

Integration Call:

Date and time:

Recording:

Week 2 — Staying In Reality

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

Recording:

Listicles:

Further Reading:

Integration Call:

Date and time:

Recording:

Week 3 — Revealing

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

Recording:

Listicles:

Further Reading:

Integration Call:

Date and time:

Recording:

Week 4 — Curiosity and Empathy

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

Recording:

Listicles:

Further Reading:

Important:

Week 5 — Ownership and Responsibility

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

Recording:

Week 5 practices:

Further Reading:

Integration Call:

Date and time:

Recording:

Week 6 — Needs, Wants and Strategies

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

Recording:

Listicles:

Week 6 practices:

Further Reading:

Integration Call:

Date and time:

Zoom link (different each time):

Recording:

Week 7 — Honoring Self and Other

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

Recording:

Week 7 practices:

Further Reading:

Integration Call:

Date and time:

Zoom link (different each time):

Recording:

Week 8 — Giving and Receiving

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

Recording:

Week 8 Practices:

Further Reading:

Week 9 — Conflict Transformation

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

Recording:

Listicles: