Pep Talks

Fundamentals of Realating

A 12-Week Deep Dive in Rewiring the Way We Connect

April 1st — June 20th, 2025

Develop social ease, emotional intelligence, and the ability to navigate interactions in with depth and confidence.

Welcome.

Welcome exactly as you are.

I’m honored that you chose to be a part of this.

Below is an overview of each session we’ll have together, and how to access them.

Recordings and other resource materials will be added to this page as well.

So it’s a good idea to add this to your bookmarks.

See you on the inside!

Session Schedule

Week 1 — Welcoming

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

April 1st, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1cV_VYbSNUImtPhn0U0QZCJ_tQNRN6bW3

 

Listicles:

5 core practices of Authentic Relating (as defined by ART International):

  1. Welcome everything
  2. Assume nothing
  3. Reveal your experience
  4. Own your experience
  5. Honor self and other

6 levels of conversational depth:

  1. External information
  2. Personal information
  3. Personal stories
  4. Philosophizing
  5. Emotional
  6. Relational

 

Week 1 practices:

1. As you go through your week, exploriment with “welcoming everything” and observe.

2. Practicing noticing which level of conversational depth you are in, and play with moving between them.

Further Reading:

Book:Conflict = Energy” by  Jason Digges (core practices of authentic relating)

Book:Radical Acceptance” by Tara Brach (welcoming what happens)

Book: “Self-Compassion” by Kristen Neff (welcoming how you’re handling it)

Book:Effortless” by yours truly (welcoming every aspect of yourself)

Thread: 6 Levels of Conversation

Article: 6 Levels of Conversation

Integration Call:

Date and time:

April 4th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

 

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o89M9utvQnPGdudhCFrT8wgvCG1VRVO7/

Week 2 — Staying In Reality

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

April 8th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/16pBDeHflD5hRioUTOmAj89YV2UxMQp-g/

Listicles:

The Work (by Byron Katie):

1. Is it true?

2. Can I absolutely know it’s true?

3. How do I feel (and react) when I believe it?

4. Who would I be without this thought?

 

The window of resilience (will be looked at in depth later on):

Image

Week 2 practices:

As you go through your week:

1. Notice your assumptions 
2. Notice the ways you’ve damned others , yourself or the world.
3. Notice how that impacts you and your relationships.

Further Reading:

Book:The 4 Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz (includes the practice)

Book:Loving What Is” by Byron Katie (the work)

Book: “The Book of Not Knowing” by Peter Ralston (unknowing)

Book:A Course In Miracles” by Foundation for Inner Peace (spiritual approach to undamning)

Book:Effortless” by yours truly (undamning ourselves + words that don’t point at reality)

Article: Separating Facts from Stories

 

Integration Call:

Date and time:

April 11th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/a-_jMgIvALJs_e9UQUUj0qyrOS4Aah7SCPMjTUnMkDGvg2clFd6mxrW07Ubi24SD.WD5Y6tXVAdIT1G8I?startTime=1744385595000
Passcode: q^26+635

Week 3 — Revealing

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

April 15th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/ReW0mbN3C-usx8i4M2mmHhLZwNMtD9eT_rQKdR6TJBbJ6LPmWOwflDDNHjAhK_c.Aoe36S0BbgDQ6O1G
Passcode: c?P?5tXC

Listicles:

5 principles of presence (as defined by Margo Greenwood):

1. Embodiment

2. Unknowing

3. Vulnerability

4. ???

5. ???

Week 3 practices:

1. Practice revealing your experience and notice what happens.

Further Reading:

Book:Daring Greatly” by Brené Brown (vulnerability)

Book:Radical Honesty” by Brad Blanton (releasing repressed emotions through revealing them)

Article: The Nuance on Vulnerability

 

Integration Call:

Date and time:

April 18th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/S91mfsi2Of-9F3GBsc48M_LRPOr1gtuoWMJT1aIFHrvBB496saXx3kzZQfHJW3cn.4ECpeEsdO6V4cZcd
Passcode: hRFmj8&0

Week 4 — Curiosity and Empathy

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

April 22nd, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/vZLXIw1zfYkL-RPoe6ONwMFGceXqGeSFVpjurPihDLPPfX4NfXxBqJmO_8g5nlvb.u5CofkJOd6D2GHkz
Passcode: wOq.v5*?

 

Listicles:

3 levels of listening (as defined by ART International):

1. WHAT is being communicated?

2. HOW is it being communicated?

3. WHY is it communicated?

 

5 levels of empathy (as defined by me, currently):

1. Cognitive empathy

2. Contextual empathy

3. Personal empathy

4. Affective empathy

5. Grokking

 

5 practices of Circling (as defined by “Relatefulness” and “Transformational Connection” in Europe):

1. Commitment to connection

2. Own your experience

3. Stay with the level of sensation

4. ???

5. Be with the other in their world

 

Week 4 practices:

As you go through your week:

1. Play with “listen + reflect + impact” while you listen to people.
2. Notice the ways you’ve damned others or create assumptions, and apply curiosity to “cure” it (this includes damning others for their damning or assuming they’re assuming)
3. Feeling bold? Invite someone to play the curiosity game!

Further Reading:

Book:7000 Ways to Listen” by Mark Nepo (listening to life itself)

Book:Getting the Love You Want” (listening to your partner + undamning each other)

Video: “Brené Brown on Empathy

Thread: “Empathy is often misunderstood (how ironic).

 

Important:

There is no integration call on Friday for this week.

Week 5 — Ownership and Responsibility

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

April 28th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/DBOygw4slajiOE-KHtc0z_xGnTupTjV5Mls85xWJfMsqfo9XnAFPJMXHNWqKduUJ.Un_j16W026VpDbMl
Passcode: @^Z96rfn

 

Week 5 practices:

As you go through your week:

1. Try and practice owning your experience, particularly using “I statements”, in moments when you feel it isn’t emotionally challenging.

2. In situations when you know it would be good to own your experience but it feels unavailable or scary to do so: Write down why. (We can use this in next week’s session.)

3. Practice sharing “truths” with people in this WhatsApp group:

“_(person’s name/entire), when you __ (identify a particular, unarguable moment or experience), I felt __(share an emotion)”

You can also share them addressed to the entire group.

 

Further Reading:

Book:Nonviolent Communication” by Marshal Rosenberg (observation vs. evaluation, and lots of info on owning your experience in speech)

Book:Extreme Ownership” by Jocko Willink (ownership as an attitude)

Book:Radical Responsibility” by Fleet Maull (ownership as an attitude, including in relationships)

Book:The 5 Personality Patterns” by Steven Kessler (character structures)

Article: “How to Save the World from Nazis, Escape the Matrix and Finally Get a Six Pack” (reclaiming your power)

Thread: Receiving Compliments Fully

 

Integration Call:

Date and time:

May 2nd, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/zBGnDTMNca7r_vyLRAQzKvdSnSJWowiPh7hP_CpyeL06Nv54qmVLjUjDDXh_epFD.jWgPDG-GZFMQj9-X
Passcode: Fw+V7aTk

Week 6 — Needs, Wants and Strategies

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

May 6th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Recording:

https://us06web.zoom.us/rec/share/LicGmiPEZFSZv9F3lZ263D3dFe8_oqyI3M-F1sM3YuivI6_1YpPqPGlSWcfGjiZi.y5IcyMSyHOpinE-P
Passcode: Ru4Fd$Hp

 

Listicles:

8 Core fears (as defined by ART International):

1. Fear of abandonment

2. Fear of being controlled

3. Fear of being ignored / invisible

4. Fear of rejection

5. Fear of criticism

6. Fear of inadequacy / failure

7. Fear of being trapped

8. Fear of being misunderstood

 

4 childhood attachment needs (as defined by Susan Campbell):

1. Protection

2. Loving attention

3. Guidance and encouragement –

4. Co-regulation

5 universal human needs (as defined by Marshall Rosenberg):

1. Connection

2. Physical well-being

3. Autonomy

4. Meaning

5. Play

 

Pseudofeelings:

Week 6 practices:

As you go through your week:

Observe your feelings, pseudofeelings, judgments and maybe even personality traits. Which need could be underneath them?

Further Reading:

Book:Addicted to Love” by Jan Geurtz (how our personalities are shaped as strategies to meet our needs)

Book:From Triggered to Tranquil” by Susan Campbell (identifying the needs underneath our triggers)

Video: NVC San Francisco Workshop

 

Integration Call:

Date and time:

May 9th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Zoom link (different each time):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/82057738393

Meeting ID: 820 5773 8393

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

Week 7 — Honoring Self and Other

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

May 13th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Zoom link (recurring for Tuesday workshops):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/89286816358

Meeting ID: 892 8681 6358

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

 

Integration Call:

Date and time:

May 16th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Zoom link (different each time):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/84845929654

Meeting ID: 848 4592 9654

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

Week 8 — Giving and Receiving

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

May 20th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Zoom link (recurring for Tuesday workshops):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/89286816358

Meeting ID: 892 8681 6358

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

 

Important:

There is no Friday integration call for this week.

Week 9 — Conflict Transformation

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

May 27th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Zoom link (recurring for Tuesday workshops):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/89286816358

Meeting ID: 892 8681 6358

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

 

Integration Call:

Date and time:

May 30th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Zoom link (different each time):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/86398399149

Meeting ID: 863 9839 9149

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

Week 10 — Subtext, Vibe and Energetics

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

June 3rd, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Zoom link (recurring for Tuesday workshops):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/89286816358

Meeting ID: 892 8681 6358

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

 

Integration Call:

Date and time:

June 6th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Zoom link (different each time):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/83761191543

Meeting ID: 837 6119 1543

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

Week 11 — Wholeness

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

June 10th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Zoom link (recurring for Tuesday workshops):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/89286816358

Meeting ID: 892 8681 6358

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

 

Integration Call:

Date and time:

June 13th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Zoom link (different each time):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/82983189975

Meeting ID: 829 8318 9975

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

Week 12 — Awesomeness

Weekly Workshop:

Date and time:

June 17th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 20:30 CEST

Zoom link (recurring for Tuesday workshops):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/89286816358

Meeting ID: 892 8681 6358

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

 

Integration Call:

Date and time:

June 20th, 2025 — 17:30 CEST – 19:00 CEST

Zoom link (different each time):

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/87911786061

Meeting ID: 879 1178 6061

Recording:

(Link to the recording will get added after the session happened 😉 )

Post-cohort Integration Calls

After week 12, there will be 2 more integration calls as part of the cohort.

The date for these is yet to be decided together, to ensure everyone can be a part of them.

From there on, you will have the possibility to join monthly workshops which continue to build on the practices we learned during the cohort.

1:1 Support

If you need additional 1:1 support around the topics from any of the session, you can freely schedule a call with me, using this link (availability will be added to the scheduler once cohort start).

Additional Questions?

If you have any remaining questions about this course, you can always reach out to me via email:

pep (at) peptalksblog.com